


got no shame

by ShipperTrash140109



Category: Dunkirk (2017)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Crack, Established Relationship, I dont know what other tags to put, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Texting, i got 2000 words out of this, im funny i swear, its just joking about it, yea
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-11
Updated: 2020-01-11
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:47:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,192
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22203589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ShipperTrash140109/pseuds/ShipperTrash140109
Summary: Alex is understandably upset when all of his achievements are undermind by his friends questionable acts in the background of his photos and videos. but maybe he's not as innocent in this 'crime' as he likes to think.
Relationships: Gibson/Tommy (Dunkirk), Implied Alex/Peter Dawson (Dunkirk), Implied Collins/Farrier (Dunkirk) - Relationship
Comments: 3
Kudos: 24
Collections: disposable camera





	got no shame

**Author's Note:**

> did i cheat? kind of, i switched the disposable camera for phones, sue me. but this was fun to write, and i'm very proud of it
> 
> title comes from 'novocaine' by the unlikely candidates

**IMALEX, tom_e, PG, dawesome, georgemills, SWOLLINS [4:31PM]**

**IMALEX** named the group **ALEX’S SHIT LIST**

_IMALEX_ **  
**I can’t believe I ever called any  
of you my friends

_tom_e_  
what?

_PG_  
I’m not your friend, why would  
you make such a gross assumption?

_IMALEX_  
shut up

you’re all terrible people  
I should’ve framed you for murder  
a long time ago

_georgemills  
_ 🙁

_IMALEX_  
you’re the only blameless one here

_tom_e_  
why add him them?  
  
*then

_IMALEX_  
because we don’t have a gc and we  
should have one.

I only want to yell at you for ten minutes

_georgemills_  
but we do

**THE ELITE [4:37PM]**

_PG_  
George delet that immediately

_georgemills  
_ what?

Oh crap!

**ALEX’S SHIT LIST [4:38PM]**

_IMALEX_  
no we don’t

George keep up

_georgemills_  
sorry

_dawesome_  
can you guys change the chat title?  
my mum checks my phone and   
she’ll get mad :/

**IMALEX** named the group **ALEX’S FUCK SHIT CUNT PISS LIST**

**dawesome** has left the group

_IMALEX_  
I’m at my fucking limit

_SWOLLINS_  
what on god’s wide earth is   
happening

_PG_  
Alex is mad at us for no reason

And Peter is scared of his mum

_tom_e_  
I’ve met his mum she’s lovely

**IMALEX** has added **dawesome** to the group

**IMALEX** named the group **ALEX’S NAUGHTY LIST**

_dawesome_  
thank you

_tom_e_  
now she’ll just think you’re in  
a weird bdsm group

_IMALEX_  
I’m not changing it again

[video4.mp4]

That’s YOU TWO, TOMMY AND PHILIPPE-   
*NECKING* in the background of a video of me   
completing a SICK kickflip

You have TARNISHED my achievements

_SWOLLINS_  
UM

_tom_e_  
it’s me!

georgemills  
is that how babies are made?

_PG_  
your kickflip wasn’t the only  
thing tarnished that day

_SWOLLINS_  
can someone deport him back to  
France for me?

_PG  
_ vas te faire encule paillettes  
habillé homme bâtard

_tom_e_  
uh oh

_IMALEX_  
‘fuck you you glitter dressed  
cuck bastard man’ -translate  
\- Philippe Hugo Guillet, 2k20

He ain’t wrong

Thank you for yelling at Collins   
for me

_SWOLLINS  
_ it’s a kilt you racist

_dawesome_  
oh my god

_georgemills_  
It’s so sad when mum and dad fight

_PG_  
don’t insult my taste in men like that

_IMALEX_  
alright moving on, this is my  
time to yell not you twos

[image76.mp4]

COLLINS adjusting his STIFFY behind  
me PROUDLY holding up my achievement  
award for WOOD TECH

I showed this to my GRANDMOTHER

Not to mention it’s STILL ON MY FUCKING  
ACCOUNT TO THIS DAY, can I not be proud of  
ANYTHING?

_PG_  
there’s a reason they call it *wood* tech

_tom_e_  
what was the context of the boner

_PG_  
probably Mr. Farrier walking past

_dawesome_  
my physics teacher?

COLLINS THAT’S GROSS

_georgemills_  
is *that* how babies are made?

_tom_e_  
it might be if Collins had any game

_SWOLLINS_  
hey, FUCK YOU

_IMALEX_  
you deserve all of this Collins, you ruined  
my moment

_tom_e_  
CoLlInS RuInEd My DrEaM JoUrnAl

_georgemills_  
I DiD NoT!

Mr FaRrIeR SeNd HiM To ThE  
PriNcIpAlS OfFiCe AnD HaVe HiM  
EXPELLED!!

_IMALEX_  
if I wasn’t being the bad guy I would’ve joined  
in and I hope you all know that

_PG_  
careful Mr. Farrier, he might pop one  
on the way

_SWOLLINS_  
fuck all of you, why am I still here?

_IMALEX_  
BECAUSE YOU’RE A SLOPPY BITCH COLLINS  
YOU LIKE PAIN DON’T YOU YOU SICK BASTARD  
THAT’S WHY YOURE STILL FUCKING HERE

_dawesome_  
Alex you’re triggering my fight or  
flight instinct

_IMALEX_  
GOOD BECAUSE YOURE NEXT

[image56.jpg]

I was really feelin myself that day

_PG_  
eww tmi

_IMALEX_  
I have connections I can and will  
deport you

I was wearing something nice, as you  
can see

and WHAT HAPPENS? PETER FUCKING   
OUTSHINES ME IN MY OWN PHOTO!

I don’t give a shit how cute your pose was  
that was sabotage

_dawesome_  
I’m in the background, people probably  
didn’t notice

_SWOLLINS_  
you’re being a little dramatic, aren’t  
you?

_IMALEX_  
‘damn, who’s the cutie in the bg?’ – a  
comment left on that fucking post before  
I WIPED IT OFF THE FACE OF MY   
ACCOUNT

_tom_e_  
yikes

_georgemills_  
don’t worry you’ll get used to it

_PG_  
what?

_SWOLLINS_  
what

_dawesome_  
what??

_georgemills_  
I’m joking I’m way cuter than you, I  
feel sorry for setting such a high bar  
for you

_tom_e_  
Alex would disagree

_PG_  
haha gross

_SWOLLINS_  
PARDON???

_IMALEX_  
MOVING SWIFTLY ON- DON’T THINK  
YOU FUCKERS CAN FINESSE YOUR  
WAY OUT OF THIS

[image45.jpg]

I spent a whole term making a little basketball  
hoop, and I did really good- so of course I want  
to celebrate- pose next to my creation. And what do  
I get for my effort?

_PG_  
I think I know where this is going

_IMALEX_  
I get PHILIPPE TRYING TO SHOVE THE HOOP WIRE  
UP COLLINS ARSE IN MY FUCKING BACKGROUND

I HATE ALL OF YOU (except you George, you’re fine atm)

_georgemills_  
😁

_PG_  
I remember doing that

Good times

_SWOLLINS_  
you could’ve really hurt me you  
bastard

_PG_  
not like it was getting used for any-  
thing good anyway

_tom_e_  
oh snap

_dawesome_  
eww what the hell

_georgemills_  
IS THAT HOW BABIES ARE MADE?

_dawesome_  
George, as your best friend and close  
confidant, I ask that you stop right now

_IMALEX_  
Tommy! My friend since early childhood, a  
brother in arms, AND A TRAITOR WHO  
RUINS NICE PHOTOS OF ME

_tom_e_  
oh Alex, you’re such a charmer, always have  
been

_IMALEX_   
[image32.jpg]

WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU TRYING TO SHOVE  
FIVE TWIGLETS INTO YOUR MOUTH AT ONCE

_PG_  
hot

_SWOLLINS_  
hot

_PG_  
hey pal, back off

_tom_e_  
I wasn’t *trying* to shove five twiglets  
into my mouth at once, I *did* shove   
five twiglets into my mouth at once

_georgemills_  
is that how babies are made

_dawesome_  
GEORGE

YOU PEOPLE HAVE RUINED HIM

_georgemills_  
ANSWER MY QUESTION COWaRD

_dawesome_  
NO

_tom_e_  
don’t worry Peter, Alex will help you show  
him

_IMALEX_  
shut the FUCK up

_dawesome_  
next time I’m added to one of these things, I’m  
just going to leave it, this is costing me too many  
braincells

**THE ELITE [7:30pm]**

_tom_e_  
do you guys still have the photos from when  
we all went to the arcade for our six month?

_PG_  
of course

_georgemills_  
I think I have a few

_SWOLLINS_  
I have some videos of me kicking  
Philippe’s arse at dance dance  
revolution

_georgemills_  
the highly anticipated sequel to red dead  
redemption- dance dance revolution

_tom_e_  
cool cool, that’s good

_SWOLLINS_  
why you asking?

_tom_e_  
I’ll tell you at school tomorrow when Alex  
has detention

also Peter stop lurking

**

“So, what were you getting at yesterday” Collins asked as he slid onto the bench, wiggling along so Peter and George could squeeze in beside him.

Tommy shuffled, slipping his hand into his pocket to pull out his phone, he unlocked it quickly, swiping through until he found what he was looking for. He held it up to the three boys across the table. “I was getting at this,” he said, watching as George, Collins’ and Peter’s eyes flicked over the screen, beside him he could feel Philippe looking at him, silently wondering.

“What am I looking at?” George asks with a frown, an expression Collins mirrors almost perfectly

“Yeah- just you and Phil looking grossly happy” Collins added, it was then that Peter’s eyes widened, and he sucked in a sharp breath, he’d obviously discovered what they were looking at.

“Alex, in the background- he was preaching decency in other people’s photos. Seems like he came up with that philosophy after our arcade hang.”

“Oh yea- didn’t he hassle you all afternoon?” George asked, looking sidewards to where Peter sat silently, the blond only nodded. “Ha! Yeah that was weird- is that why you kept stirring him yesterday?” the brunet asked Tommy, who smirked and nodded, the two boys breaking into giggles.

“I checked the photos I had, he’s near or with Peter in every single one- I’m pretty sure he got an inch closer with every photo- he was practically hanging off you, mate” Tommy explained, shooting a sympathetic look to the blond rolling his eyes across the table. “You know, it’s very disrespectful to act so thirsty on such a romantic occasion” Tommy pointed out, swiping to show his prime examples, Peter’s face quickly turned from pink to red.

“Just so you know, as your best friend, I consent to you pursuing a romantic relationship with one Alex Ichabod Elmslie- at your own risk of course” George announced, patting Peter on the back, the young man hissing a ‘shut up’ under his breath. “Hey, I’m just saying, the clout gain is promising if you do vibe with him” George exclaimed, sticking both hands up in self defense.

“Don’t call it ‘vibing with’ for god sake” Peter sighed, rubbing a hand over his face.

“My condolences” Philippe hummed.

“Wait- does Alex like like you?” Collins asked, squinting at the photo’s being swiped through on Tommy’s phone.

“Duh, that’s why he was trying to lay pipe when Peter agreed to play that dance game with him” Philippe almost snapped, Collins frowning at him and glaring.

“Don’t know what came over me” Peter sighed, running a hand up through his hair.

“Alex, probably” Philippe whispered, yelping as Tommy elbowed him in the side. With a grimace on his face and a hand rubbing at the sore spot on his ribs, he looked up at Peter, “like George said, you could do worse than local celebrity Alex Elmslie” Philippe mumbled, digging around in his bag for the lunch he’d been anticipating for two periods, shooting a glare at Tommy as he did. “For example, you could be dating Collins, how terrible is that?”

“I will strangle you with your own tie I swear to god” Collins growled through gritted teeth.

“So, what are you going to do with this information?” Peter asked, picking at the sticker of an apple he’d pulled from his bag, he didn’t look too bothered by the acknowledgment of Alex’s fondness for him, more so annoyed at the teasing and it being the focus of their conversation. In fact, he was perhaps the only person in their group that wouldn’t vomit at the idea of Alex liking them.

“Call him out in the group chat then drop it- hated that holier than thou shit he was pulling” Tommy explained, leaning forwards to rest against the elbows planted on the bench, his eyes were looking past Peter and George and at the tuckshop, he briefly wondered what today’s special was- other than a healthy serving of exposing hypocrisy.

**

**ALEX’S NAUGHTY LIST [3:30PM]**

**tom_e** has named the group **TOMMY’S NAUGHTY LIST**

_IMALEX_  
what is the meaning of this?

_PG_  
you’re in for it now, buckaroo

_tom_e_  
you’re a hypocrite, Alex Ichabod Elmslie

_IMALEX_  
what?

_tom_e_  
THERE I WAS, THINKING I COULD HAVE A  
NICE SIXTH MONTH ANNIVERSARY, AND WHAT  
HAPPENS? YOU ALEX, YOU ABSOLUTE WHORE

[image21.jpg]

[image11.jpg]

[image32.jpg]

The proof is in the pudding, and your pudding was caught  
red handed in the act of HYPOCRISY!

And harassing a defenceless young boy

_SWOLLINS_  
dun dun DUN

_IMALEX_  
I can explain

_tom_e_  
you fell for the boyish charms of our very own  
Peter Dawson and RUINED MY ANNIVERSARY  
PICTURES WITH YOUR SMUTTY CANOODLING

_IMALEX_  
yea about that

_georgemills_  
Peter’s pregnant, isn’t he? He’s been  
glowing recently, oh my Alex, this must  
be so tough for you

_tom_e  
_ you disgust me Alex, after all these years, my  
best friend- a hypocrite, I hope this child does not  
learn of this sickening affliction of yours

_SWOLLINS_  
as Mr. Dawson’s favourite son, I know  
this news will be difficult for him to handle.  
but if you hurt sweet Peter, I will go dracarys  
on your arse

_dawesome_  
shove off, he’s MY dad

and I will not confirm nor deny my pregnancy until  
Jeremy Kyle has been contacted

_PG_  
who’s that?

**tom_e** has kicked **PG** from the group

_tom_e_  
we serve nothing but justice in this chat

**IMALEX** **à** **DAWESOME [3:35PM]**

_IMALEX_  
sorry about that

_dawesome_  
I don’t know if I can raise this  
child around a hypocrite

_IMALEX_  
is this actually Peter?

_dawesome_  
of course it bloody is

you must not know me if you think  
I’m at all weirded out about all that

Phil and Tommy kept sucking face,  
kind of glad you wouldn’t leave me alone

George was too busy playing that stupid  
shooter game, was ready to go home

_IMALEX_  
guess I made your arcade experience  
pretty… dawesome

_dawesome_  
now you’re pushing it

**TOMMY’S NAUGHTY LIST [3:40PM]**

_tom_e_  
PUMPKIN IS A TEXTURE, WHAT THE  
FUCK ARE YOU ON ABOUT?

_SWOLLINS_  
IT’S A FLAVOUR- HOW THE FUCK  
IS IT A TEXTURE?

_georgemills_  
my home ec teacher has never called  
pumpkin a texture

**tom_e** has added **PG** to the group

_tom_e_  
back me up here

_PG  
_ omg I lived bitch  
pumpkin is a texture, nothing else  
feels like pumpkin

_tom_e_  
THANK YOU

_SWOLLINS_  
that is a DISGUSTING conflict of  
interest- Philippe is full of shite

_tom_e_  
I’m gonna reach through your phone screen  
and conflict your interest in a minute

_IMALEX_  
pumpkin isn’t a flavour

_tom_e_  
THANK YOU

_IMALEX_  
it’s an emotion

_SWOLLINS_  
what?

_georgemills_  
um

**tom_e** has left the group

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> leave a comment and kudos or i will be sad (joking, but not really)


End file.
